Jesus Has His Yearly Performance Review

Considering how the Catholic Bishops want to tell people what to do, I though about who was really in charge of that organization. And so I wrote this piece. I just warped around the Sun and used my universal translator to listen into one performance review that didn’t go too well.

“Greetings, Jesus. Have a seat.  Well it’s that time of year again. Performance review time.  I’ll go through the review and then you can comment later before you sign it.

“Okay, the good news is that the people seem to like you and they loved the free food you got them at that picnic.  I don’t want to know where you got those loaves and fishes, if they fell off a donkey or what, but it was  great because it didn’t put a dent in our food budget. Some people called it a miracle, but it’s only a miracle if you’re not in the business of selling loaves and fishes.  Our concessions vendors were really unhappy that day.   But our real problem was revenue from plate passing was way down.

In the future if you are going to give away free food, remind them that there is no “free . . . → Read More: Jesus Has His Yearly Performance Review

How To Use Social Media as a Weapon Against Organizations

Tuesday, February 7th on Virtually Speaking Mike Stark and I discussed what we could learn from the SOPA fight and the Susan G Komen Debacle. Listen to the podcast by going to the BlogTalkRadio link

There will be a billion pixels spilt on these stories that you can read elsewhere by scholars, experts and journalists. What I’m most interested in is what works/worked for the media activists out there.

How we can replicate this to fight the right? How can we press the advantage? Why the left will NOT press the advantage. How will the Right defend against this in the future and who will they enlist to help them?

BTW, can anyone else see the fingerprints and style of Ari Fleischer all over Brinker’s media interviews and statements?

(Fleischer personally interviewed candidates for the position of “Senior Vice President for Communications and External Relations” it’s a safe bet that he would approve and suggest someone who mirrors his style.)

What steps will the PR experts at Ogilvy take to try to repair the brand?

The right has often taken tactics and methods used first by us, discredited them until they have time to become . . . → Read More: How To Use Social Media as a Weapon Against Organizations

Romney Wins Florida! Chris Christie Claims Credit

Last October Chris Christie threw his support behind Mitt Romney, I’m pretty sure that is the reason that Romney will win tonight. Check out the video of the phone call Christie makes to comedian Jimmy Dore bragging about how his support for Romney will help him win. The whole podcast can be found at on the Jimmy Dore show. website. I like to describe the podcast as “The Daily Show for Radio”, very funny, very smart. The “celebrities” who call in are voiced by @MikeMacRaeMike. His Bill O’Rielly and Herman Cain are spot on and the writing, by Dore, Frank Connif, Paul Gilmartin, Robert Yasumura and Steve Rosenfield is hilarious.

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“Mitt paid 13.9% in Taxes? Sucker!” GE Tax Guys Taunt Romney’s Tax Guys.

I often have conversations with people who don’t exist to illustrate real conversations I know about and have a 93% confidence level have actually happened. Here’s a conversation I had last night about Mitt, taxes, GE and strippers. I’m not lying, I’m writing fiction with my mouth. – Homer Simpson

Over a single malt whiskey at the Scruples Lounge in Bridgeport, Connecticut I spoke to Sam Johnels, junior deputy tax guy for General Electric.

“We totally could have gotten the Government to pay Mitt. The guys he hired? PricewaterhouseCooper? More like Pricy Underwater Houses Pooper! They couldn’t figure out how to get the IRS to pay him? Idiots. If we were in charge of his return, he would be getting $3.2 million from Uncle Sam instead of paying out one thin dime.”

“Do you think that the fact that Mitt was running for President had anything to do with how they structured the returns?” I asked.

“I suppose so, I hate all that political ‘What will it look like to the regular people?’ bullshit.

“Our job is to make the tax system our bitch. That’s why at GE we hire former IRS and Treasury people. It’s an embarrassment to our . . . → Read More: “Mitt paid 13.9% in Taxes? Sucker!” GE Tax Guys Taunt Romney’s Tax Guys.

What Wolf and You Can Learn from the Irish Press for the GOP Debate

At the GOP debate on Thursday will Wolf Blitzer ask Mitt, Newt, Rick or Ron any question with the tenaciousness we see on display in this video at a European Central Bank press-conference in Ireland?

I doubt it, but it could happen. It should happen. After all, Blitzer is an Emmy award-winning anchor for CNN and is also a recipient of the Peabody award for his Hurricane Katrina coverage, the Alfred I. duPont Award for his coverage of the tsunami disaster in Southeast Asia and an Edward R. Murrow Award for CNN’s September 11 coverage. Let’s hear his own words of advice to CNN iReporters (their citizen journalist program) on asking questions:

Q: What tips do you have for getting people to get comfortable and open up?

A: My rule of thumb is to be polite but firm in asking the questions and trying to make sure I get the answers.

Q: What is the one piece of advice you wish you were taught about interviewing that you had to learn on your own?

A: The most important thing is to listen to the answer and follow up when appropriate.

Why . . . → Read More: What Wolf and You Can Learn from the Irish Press for the GOP Debate

Why Did Mitt Lose to Newt? No Flag Pin!

Now some of you might laugh and consider this a silly reason for Mitt’s loss.  I disagree. This is a very important thing to note. It is so important that it was the subject of the mainstream political press just five short years ago during the last Presidential campaign. Only that time the person not wearing a flag pin was Sen. Barak Obama. On Oct 4th, 2007 the Drudge report ran the story, “Obama Drops American Flag Pin.” It was then picked up by the national main stream media.

The exact same thing should happen here with Romney and Paul not wearing flag pins.

Matt Drudge, ABC’s Good Morning America and ABC’s World News, host Charles Gibson should all cover it (BTW, must credit Spocko of Spocko’s Brain) at the same level as the coverage of Obama’s flag pin story.  This time it is not a Democrat but a Republican skipping the flag pin, shouldn’t they know better?

I look forward to Sean Hannity saying the same things about Mitt Romney and Ron Paul for not wearing a flag pin as he  said about Obama. It shouldn’t make a difference if the person is a Democrat or a Republican . . . → Read More: Why Did Mitt Lose to Newt? No Flag Pin!

Which Superhero would you be? 9 yr old asks GOP Presidential Candidates

 

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The Last Days of a Christmas Tree

The last days of a Christmas tree.

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Resolutions my ass! Found on Street Jan 2, 2012

Clearly someone had enought with the New Year’s resolution to lose weight.

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The Elf’s Lament with Lyrics

Just heard this Christmas song for the first time today. Very funny. Bare Naked Ladies.

“Elf’s Lament”

I’m a man of reason, and they say “‘Tis the season to be jolly” But it’s folly when you volley for position

Never in existence has there been such a resistance To ideas meant to free us If you could see us, then you’d listen

Toiling through the ages, making toys on garnished wages There’s no union We’re only through when we outdo the competition

I make toys, but I’ve got aspirations Make some noise Use your imagination Girls and boys, before you wish for what you wish for There’s a list for who’s been Naughty or nice, but consider the price to an elf

A full indentured servitude can reflect on one’s attitude But that silly red hat just makes the fat man look outrageous

Absurd though it may seem, you know, I’ve heard there’s even been illegal doping And though we’re coping, I just hope it’s not contagious

You try to start a movement, and you think you see improvement But when thrown into the moment, we just don’t seem so courageous

I make toys, but I’ve got aspirations Make . . . → Read More: The Elf’s Lament with Lyrics