Spocko Needs a Comedy Break: 20 Million Plastic Chickens Recall Edition
20 million chickens may have eaten tainted feed
Poultry must be assessed by government before it’s processed, USDA says
A few headlines I expect to see this week:
“There are diluted lethal chemicals in your chicken! We won’t tell you which brands until after the sports and weather from Sunny Storm!”
- Kent Brockman EyeWitlessNews
“The crap that killed your kitty in is your chicken cutlet! When deaths go up by 30 percent you’ll be the first to know which brands!” Action News 7
“Is your pappy pooped? Can’t pee? Passed out? Passed on? Call the CDC and let us know, you might be the winner in the 2007 food lottery!” (You might already be a winner! Residences of the Utah and Indiana need not enter, you have already been entered.)
For the chicken farmers? Consider this good practice for future avian flu outbreaks.
For the people who are supposed to have implemented the Import Security Plan but haven't actually implemented it, consider this good practice.
If you are in the DHS bioterroism unit, again, consider this good practice, time to test your chops.