Monday, January 30, 2006

If only Mike Wallace was Alive

An Open Letter to 60 Minutes.

I really enjoyed the hard hitting story on Deborah Voight’s weight loss. This is the kind of investigative reporting and powerful storytelling that will keep you safe from lawsuits, right-wing bloggers and Karl Rove’s wrath. I look forward to more of the same from the new gentler 60 Minutes.

Seriously, what kind of chicken shit outfit have you become? I’m just glad Mike Wallace isn’t alive to see this.

Just who and what are you afraid of? Just how cowed are you to be doing celebrity weight loss stories? 60 Minutes is one of the few shows that still has the resources to bust open something like the domestic spying story. You could demand the White House memos regarding Hurricane Katrina. You could refuse to be sucked into the lazy, “He said, she said” type of political reporting. Dig for some deep truth damn it!

You used to drive the nation’s conversation, not hide in the corner and worry about right-wing nutball bloggers (who as you now know had financial connections to right-wing groups and was tipped off before the story even aired).

There are so many real stories you could do, for example:

o How much money is really being lost in Iraq and who’s getting the pay offs? Don’t pussyfoot around talking to mid-level bureaucrats who wring their hands and shrug their shoulders. Do the kind of work that leads to law breaking people going to jail.

o Do a story about outsourcing and the massive net negative impact on the majority of people. They can’t connect the dots because they think it is just their problem, a personal failing instead of a systematic process. You can connect the dots.

o Show us how capital is chasing cheap labor around the globe, gaming the system and breaking both international and US laws to exploit people and destroy lives.

o Do a segment about what our massive debt to China MEANS to all of us in the form of a compelling story.

We want REAL stories about important issues. That is what you do. Or at least that is what you did. Come on, get in the game! We don’t need anymore silly ass stories like tonight, leave those to ET. You are 60 Minutes for god’s sake. So you got your nose bloodied, suck it up. Do something you can be proud of. Get some lawyers with guts to bullet proof your stories if you are afraid of being sued again. If they sue you, tell us how they responded. Make sure we know what bullies they are.

You can save some lives with your reporting! You can expose a man who is ignoring our constitution and who would be king instead of a president. Or you can become 60 Minutes-Lite and keep covering the fascinating lives of singers, dancers, athletes and actors.

Be MORE daring this year. Be relevant. Make 60 minutes EVENT TV again. You sure as hell aren’t going to do it running weight loss stories.

Mr. Spocko


Anonymous Anonymous said...

What would Andy Rooney say?
Oh wait, he's still alive. Barely. Perhaps he's a muppet. You would think they'd at least give the soft stuff to Andy. After all, isn't that why he's there?
At this rate, HE's going to get the CBS anchor job. Or maybe he'll be scooped up by Best Week Ever on VH1.

7:19 PM  
Blogger CmdrSue said...


I don't think Mike Wallace is dead. That's why his weirdling son was quoted in December saying, "He's lost it. The man has lost it. What can I say," the younger Wallace lamented to WRKO Boston radio host Howie Carr on Friday.

"He's 87-years old and things have set in," the Fox anchor continued. "I mean, we're going to have a competence hearing pretty soon."

But I guess at 87 he isn't up to going over to 60 Minutes and kicking some booty.

The only weight loss I want on a program of their caliber is the hundreds of pounds the White House would lose if the scandals were uncovered and prosecuted.

7:13 PM  
Anonymous simon poulsen said...

Don't miss next weeks "extreme makeover" episode of 60 Minutesdietlitelessfillingpablum. Softball journalism for the "out of state, out of mind" set. I think i'm losing my poligrip on reality.

8:48 PM  
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12:32 AM  

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